When CHARLIE SHEEN said last week that ASHTON KUTCHER sucks he didn't really mean it.  He was actually railing against "Two and a Half Men" . . . and insinuating that Ashton was just an innocent victim of its suckiness.  He said, quote, "I'm tired of lying . . . I'm tired of pretending the show doesn't suck . . . I'm tired of pretending Ashton doesn't suck . . . It's nothing personal.  I just feel bad for him, he's saddled with such bad writing."  It seemed pretty clear that Charlie wasn't targeting Ashton.  Still, he felt the need to apologize to Ashton. So he posted a message on his website saying, quote, "Dear Ashton, My bad.  I was disrespectful to a man doing his best.  I got excited and threw you into a crossfire. The rest of my statement I stand behind.  You, however, deserve better.  Safety in your travels good sir."  He signed it, "The 'late' Charlie Harper."  (--That was his character on the show, who was, of course, killed off.)  In related news . . . Charlie begins shooting his FX series "Anger Management" on March 22nd.  There's no word yet on a premiere date.

All the tabloids and gossip websites want to claim that CHRIS BROWN and RIHANNA are back together.  But Chris has a girlfriend.  Obviously, that doesn't fit the narrative.  So somebody had to come up with a solution.  RadarOnline.com has done it.  They found an "unidentified source" who was willing to tell them that Chris and his girlfriend, model KARRUECHE TRAN, have an OPEN RELATIONSHIP.  The source says, quote, "Karrueche isn't stupid, and she has told friends that they have an open relationship.  She never asks him about Rihanna, ever.  Chris will take several days to call her back at times, and that is OK with Karreuche. She doesn't pressure or hound Chris, it's just not what she is about.  She recognizes that they are both young, and she isn't going to let the fact Chris is spending time with his ex-girlfriend come between what they have."  Here's the official word from Chris' rep . . . quote, "He and Rihanna are just friends.  He's not cheating."

Comedian DAVID CROSS admits he snorted cocaine during the 2009 White House Correspondents Dinner . . . right there in the same room with PRESIDENT OBAMA and his Secret Service detail.  But he wasn't trying to get high . . . and he didn't.  He says, quote, "It was a tiny granule of coke that I put on my wrist and said, 'Watch this.  I need a witness.'  And then I ducked under the table and did it.  It wasn't like I got high.  The jolt was similar to licking an empty espresso cup."  So why did he do it?  He says, quote, "It was just about being able to say that I did it, that I did cocaine in the same room as the president.  I'm not proud of it, nor am I ashamed of it."